10 Reasons You Shouldn’t Date Your Yoga Instructor (Funny)

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Most people in the fitness industry are easy on the eyes. You walk into a room and see an instructor sitting there with this big Buddha-like smile, glowing skin, an aura of ease, and a body of perfection. The music on their playlist is amazing. Their smell is euphoric (thank you essential oils), and every time they adjust you in class, it feels so personal.

Obviously, these are silly stereotypes, but it’s all in good fun! This article is an ode to what your yoga teacher constantly reminds you to do while you’re deeply concentrated in a pose: smile and lighten up a little!

Here are 10 reasons why you shouldn’t date your yoga instructor:

1. Distractions. Distractions. Distractions.

You used to envision what their cute butt looked like underneath that tight pair of spandex or yoga pants. Now you know, and it’s all you can see. You can’t hold Warrior III for the life of you, you’re slipping all over your mat, and every time your teacher advises the class to find a focal point, your eyes go straight to their naughty bits.

2. You’ll never want to get intimate with anyone else but them . . . ever again

Yoga instructors practice mindfulness, and urge their students to do the same. This means being fully in the moment, listening to your body, and connecting deeper to your highest, best self. In between the sheets, your teacher-turned-lover will ever so slowly discover your body. The patience, the foreplay, the flexibility . . . that’s a tough act to follow!

3. So. Much. Sweat.

Why is it that you never felt self-conscious about your sweat in class before? Now you’re a mixture of nervous and hot and bothered, along with actually perspiring from getting your heart rate up. You imagine yourself sailing away in your river of sweat, right out of the classroom, never to be seen again.

4. They’re way too zenned out to back you up in a fight

Your yoga boo is well-versed on how to remain in a peacefully zen state regardless of what’s going on around them. So if you pick a fight, you better be prepared to hold your own, because your yoga honey only packs peace signs and smiles.

5. They take their health seriously, and will expect you to do the same

Yogis are all about balance, and understand that their body is a temple. They want to eat what’s good for their mind, body and soul, and expect you to nourish yourself similarly. So, while they delicately indulge in one piece of their homemade raw, organic chocolate date balls for energy and vitality, they might make you think twice about that candy bar you just bought from 7-11.

6. It’s like dating a celebrity

Not to give yoga teachers too much of an ego boost, but anyone whose job it is to transform other people’s lives is likely to have some sort of cult following. You’re going to want to be number one in their life, but you’re likely going to have to deal with a long line of people post-yoga class wanting to ask questions, thank them, or give them a great big sweaty hug.

7. Watch out – they like to give hugs!

Speaking of hugs, hopefully you’re not the jealous type, because yoga teachers are lovers. They dish out hugs like they dish out Namastes, so before and after class, it’s going to be a hug party and everyone’s invited.

8. They light incense like it’s their job (it kinda is)

Yoga teachers love their incense. They light it at the yoga studio, and they keep it wafting throughout their house too. Scents of sandalwood will waft through your nostrils any time you come over, so hopefully you like the smell!

9. They’ll give you a newfound appreciation for your body

In yoga class and in the bedroom, yoga teachers promote an appreciation for the human body. They guide you to learn more about what feels good, and in turn, you learn more about how to find your bliss each and every day. You’ll be on a magic carpet ride of self-exploration that will boost your physical self-confidence, whether it’s feeling more comfortable in your own skin, or taking it all off with no shame in your game.

10. They’re incredibly patient, and will hold you up to the same standards

A perfect handstand takes time and practice. Sitting silently in meditation wasn’t accomplished overnight. Your yoga instructor-turned-lover knows a thing or two about patience, especially when it comes to relationships, which take time to progress and grow deeper. A yoga instructor is willing to put in the work, and will expect the same from you.

Plus . . . It’s going to be really awkward to take their class if you break up

They say not to mix business with pleasure, like dating a co-worker, and the same can be said for trying to date your yoga instructor. The reason you liked them so much to begin with stemmed from their teaching and taking their yoga classes. Now you’re left with the difficult dilemma as to whether you can go back to how things were. And guess what? You probably can’t.

Dating tends to get kind of serious when people put it into words. The do’s, the dont’s and the what-if’s are ridiculous! But just like this article, it can be quite comical when you try to pick it all apart. So go ahead . . . sweat it out, smell that incense, eat rabbit food for their sake, and laugh a little. 🙂